Real talk for women in leadership—delivered every other Thursday. Short, story-driven notes on confidence, visibility, hard conversations, and building a career you actually want. Expect practical tools, honest takes, and the occasional “wait… I needed that” moment.
We need to talk about women tearing other women down
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I’m just going to say it. We spend a lot of time talking about the boys’ club, broken systems and all the ways men make it harder for women to succeed. And yes, all of that exists. But we are avoiding another huge part of the problem: women are tearing other women down at work. They are leaving women out of meetings. Withholding information. Spreading rumors. Questioning someone’s credibility behind her back. Smiling in her face while quietly trying to make sure she doesn’t get the opportunity, promotion or recognition. And somehow, we still act like we aren’t allowed to talk about it. Because it doesn’t fit the “women support women” message. Because we don’t want to give anyone another reason to criticize women. Or because we’re afraid we’ll be labeled difficult, dramatic or—my personal favorite—not a team player. But ignoring it isn’t helping women. It’s protecting bad behavior. Women do not need more inspirational posts telling us to fix each other’s crowns. We need to be honest about what is actually happening inside our workplaces—and what we’re doing to one another. Now, this doesn’t mean every disagreement is bullying. Women are allowed to be direct. We are allowed to challenge each other, give tough feedback and not be best friends. But there is a very real difference between conflict and behavior designed to isolate, undermine or damage another woman’s credibility. And when it happens quietly, it can make you question your own judgment for months. This week on Loud & Lifted, I’m talking with Dr. Vanessa Vershaw, author of The Sisterhood Paradox, about why women bully other women at work, what this behavior actually looks like and what you can do when you realize you are the target. It is uncomfortable. It may make a few people defensive. Good. We need to have this conversation. 🎧 Listen to the full episode with Vanessa: Stay Loud and Lifted, Betsy Lead louder. Grow stronger. Don’t do it alone. Want a group where women actually support women?That’s why I created Loud & Lifted Circles—small, monthly groups built for honest conversation, real support and women who genuinely want to see each other succeed. New Circles are forming in Harrisburg, Lancaster and York, Pennsylvania as well as virtual. Learn more. |
Loud & Lifted
Real talk for women in leadership—delivered every other Thursday. Short, story-driven notes on confidence, visibility, hard conversations, and building a career you actually want. Expect practical tools, honest takes, and the occasional “wait… I needed that” moment.
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